Writers in the Storm

by Kitty Bucholtz

When I started writing, I published a few articles and devotionals, and then I tried to figure out what kind of novel I wanted to write. I discovered that romance novels accounted for about half of the paperback market and I thought: I like romance, I’m happily married, I’ll write one of those.

I wrote and wrote - Christian romances, category romances, stand-alone romances, first person, third person, contemporary, 1940s - whew! I tried everything looking for my voice. Then one day a friend asked me if I’d heard of chick lit. Suddenly, the light dawned and the heavens opened and I danced with angels for a while! I’d found myself!

I quickly signed with an agent who sent my book out to eight of the biggest New York publishers. Both of us had high hopes. But the best we received was two replies of “we almost bought it.” As it turned out, chick lit was dying.

A few more years went by, but no one was enamored with my new stories, including my agent. She’d found her niche and it was Romance with a capital “r”. But that wasn’t precisely what I was writing. After four and half years, we amicably parted company and I sat down to figure myself out once again.

Back in the 1990s, I heard a woman speak at our writers group about all her rejections and how she finally decided to self-publish her book. By the time she spoke to our group, she’d sold over 100,000 copies of her children’s picture book on her own. A couple publishers who had rejected it earlier called her up and offered her 12% royalties to take over. She said no.

So here I was, thinking about my career - or lack thereof - knowing I’d found my voice, and finding everywhere I researched that “everyone” was saying that a humorous voice in a “with romantic elements” story was hard to sell.

I went to grad school to get my MA in Creative Writing thinking I would simply become a better writer and then I’d start getting contracts. But I kept hearing that publishers were buying less than ever due to the economy, and I was getting tired of waiting.

During my final semester in early 2011, I decided to do some more research into digital self-publishing. Things had really started to take off in that arena, but I understood that the biggest obstacle would be finding my audience. What kind of person would like what I wrote enough to buy it, and how would I reach her?

I flew to New York for the Romance Writers of America conference and pitched my superhero book to editors and agents there. Regardless of where the industry was headed, most revenue in books was still being generated by print copies from big publishers and distributors. But I only heard more of the same - “It sounds fun, but I don’t know how to sell it,” and “I like your story idea, but romantic comedy doesn’t sell well. How much sex is in it?”

By the time my plane landed back home in Sydney, I’d decided to self-publish that already-completed book from 2004. It wasn’t doing anything sitting on my computer, and worst case scenario I’d be out about $600. I’d already made notes about some edits I wanted to make to my book and then I was going forward!

It’s true that your friends and family can only buy so many copies of your book, but I’d been hearing potential readers tell me for years, “I just love how you write! When can I buy your book?” If I could find my audience, I could at least make a living, even if it was only barely enough to get by.

I signed up for a 10-day online class about how to format your book for Kindle. Let me just say, this is not a process for the technologically challenged or the faint of heart! I worked *all* day, *every* day for those ten days and barely got my book up on the last day of class.

But it was up! My novel, Little Miss Lovesick, was available for sale on Amazon!

More confusing hard work got the book up on Barnes and Noble, Smashwords, and Apple’s iTunes/iBookstore. In 2 ½ weeks, I’ve sold 58 copies and have three reviews posted (one, not even written by a friend!).

I have a three-page To Do list that is probably missing a lot of things I need to do that I don’t even know about yet. I had a couple days this week where I got very little done because I was so overwhelmed by both the amount of work and the newness of it all. *How* do I do this or that?

But I’ve never felt better about my career in my life! Even though I have to move to a different country next month, I don’t want to stop. I’m creating business strategies for pricing, for finding my audience, for the publishing order of future books. I’ve got our DBA name registered with the state of California, and I’m working on getting a separate checking account. I’m researching all the small business paperwork that needs to be done, and I’m preparing to write an ebook on that, too!

Self-publishing is a time-consuming and difficult job, and a lot of the work eats away at your writing time. But I talked to a friend who got her first publishing contract this year, and her publisher is asking her to do about 75% of the stuff I’m doing!

She doesn’t lounge on her deck writing her next book every day. She, too, is rushing to meet the next deadline while also creating a Facebook presence, a Twitter presence, building a better web site, brainstorming how to blog differently/better, etc., etc.

Neither of us thinks we have it easier than the other. Publishing your book - no matter how you do it - is more time-consuming in 2011 than it was when the authors we grew up with were doing it. I encourage you to do your research no matter which direction you go.

It’s a rewarding process either way. But it’s also a lot of work. So do the research, choose a path - or take both paths with two different books - and then remind yourself every day, I love my job!

What are your thoughts about self-publishing? Do you have any questions for me? If you've decided to go the e-pub route, what was it that prompted your decision?

Kitty Bucholtz decided to combine her undergraduate degree in business, her years of experience in accounting and finance, and her graduate degree in creative writing to become a writer-turned-independent-publisher.

Her first novel, Little Miss Lovesick, was released in September 2011 as an ebook and will be available by December in print format. Kitty has also written magazine articles, devotionals, and worked as a magazine editor. She is the co-founder of Routines for Writers where she blogs every Wednesday. Her next novel, Love at the Fluff N Fold, will be released in Spring 2012. You can keep up with Kitty on Facebook, Twitter, or at her web site.

by Jenny Hansen

The future belongs to those who believe
in the beauty and the power of their dreams.
~Eleanor Roosevelt

Dreams are a funny thing. Nightly dreams usually fade in the morning rush, except for the periodic nightmares that scorch our consciousness. Then there’s the waking dreams. Those elusive wishes we keep tucked deep inside our hearts as we go about our daily journey.

We writers chase our dreams every day we put our fingers to the keyboard. Waking dreams are a constant in our creative psyches -- so real we can see them, so fragile we worry they’ll break.

I watched Tangled the other day with my toddler. She loves the music and the movement and will sit with me, almost through the whole film, completely mesmerized by each character. This particular Disney movie rivets me too, and do you know why?

Tangled is about dreams.

Chasing them, achieving them. . .and the wistfulness of letting old dreams die. If you read my post about focusing on your story’s DNA, you’d know “dreams” are the theme that weaves through Tangled. From the beginning of the movie, when the dreaming baby is stolen, through songs like "When Will My Life Begin" and "I Have A Dream,” Disney is punching this dream theme home.

There’s a scene just before the end of Act 2 that perfectly describes the funny, capricious nature of dreams:

[In the boat, Rapunzel sighs, suddenly feeling afraid]
Flynn Rider: [noticing the look on Rapunzel's face] You OK?
Rapunzel: [whispers] I'm terrified.
Flynn Rider: [softly] Why?
Rapunzel: I've been looking out a window for eighteen years, dreaming about what it might feel like when those lights rise in the sky. What if it's not everything that I dreamed it would be?
Flynn Rider: It will be.
Rapunzel: And what if it is? What do I do then?
Flynn Rider: Well that's the good part, I guess. You get to go find a new dream.

This scene sums up why so many writers trip over their dreams: Reaching for your dreams is scary.

It takes some serious nerve to lay your heart open and shout to the world, “THIS is what I want more than anything.” To throw your “all” into the fray and reach for a dream takes guts and, something I struggle with, patience. Because dreams don't happen all at once. They take baby steps forward and twists and turns to achieve.

Dreams take time.

We’ve been talking about fear for the last week or so, here at Writers In The Storm. There was Laura Drake’s post – Fear of NOT Succeeding – that started the Fear Throwdown last week. Laura worries constantly about running out of time.

Fae Rowen answered the challenge with a beautiful post called, “Fear of Success” where she shared that she fears not meeting expectations and submitting work that is less than perfect.

D.A. Watt balanced both sides this last Monday with “Are You A Head Case? Fear No More!” Deb worries about dropping the ball in her personal list of responsibilities and spreading herself too thin trying to be "Super Me."

As I read these lovely posts from my fellow bloggers, I thought about the source of all this fear (remember, I’m the ultimate Big Picture girl here at WITS). It’s all stems from our waking dreams.

Dreams are important and scary and real – for a writer, chasing them is the hardest game in town.

Why is it scary? How does our traitorous psyche manage to kick our butts so soundly? Because we worry. We creative types worry about the darndest things! And we often allow that worry to defeat us. Chuck Wendig wrote a post over on TerribleMinds last week where he discussed how “Writers Must Kill Self-Doubt Before Self-Doubt Kills Them.” (It's wonderful!)

So what do writers worry about the most? I've narrowed it down to some version of the following five items:

1. What if I write the book andnobody buys it?
2. What if I write the book and everybody buys it…can I be that brilliant again?
3. What if I can’t meet the deadlines of a publishing contract?
4. Who would want to read what I have to say?
5. When I say what I have to say, they’ll know who I am.

Every time an artist creates, they’re shouting to the world: “this is who I am.” What a heady, frightening, mind-blowing thing! For most artists, if our work is found wanting, it feels like WE are being rejected too.

How is the worried artist supposed to cope?

Laura and I are HUGE fans of titanium panties. We just strap on the Big Girl Titanium Underpants and do the next thing. For myself, if I stop and think about the fear, I’ll hyperventilate. I have to keep going, even if I work on something different then the thing that’s scaring the crap out of me.

What have I observed other writers doing when things are in the crapper? When rejections roll in and plots stall, when blog posts bomb and the WIP rises up like a scary beast?

• Friends and family are great when the going is rough.
• Some days wine is a requirement.
• A supportive critique group is amazing.
• A writing network is priceless. This could be your local writing chapter, or online groups like www.SheWrites.com or Twitter communities like #myWANA,  #ROW80,  #writecampaign or The #LifeListClub.

How do you deal with the fearful part of dreams? What do you do when it’s time to make a new dream? We’d love to hear about it!

Jenny

About Jenny:
Jenny fills her nights with humor: writing memoir, women’s fiction, chick lit, short stories (and chasing after the newly walking Baby Girl). By day, she provides training and social media marketing for an accounting firm. After 15 years as a corporate software trainer, she’s digging this sit down and write thing. In addition to being a founding member here at Writers In The Storm, Jenny also hangs out on Twitter at jhansenwrites and at her other blog, More Cowbell.

We're just in time for Halloween, and I'm baaack! by D.A. WATT

 This past week, I found myself scurrying along the side yard fence to enter my back door. I didn’t want to chance another run in with an enormous, icky spider’s web hosted by a giant cross orb weaver, that was commandeering my entire front entry.

That’s when I realized something: I’m tired of being a wimp.

So I sat down on my couch with a gallon of pistachio walnut ice cream (nonfat) and did some deep, heavy thinking, just like FDR, the US President who said this.

That's when I decided: FEAR NO MORE. I wrote it on a Post-It note, along with:

1. Rise above my fear of disappointing others. 
2. Say, “No, I can’t,” at least once this week.
3. Be bold: Emergency Response Team training tomorrow, great time to act fearlessly.
4. Don’t allow any webs, real or imagined, to get in your way.
5. Failure is not an option. Don’t give up, especially on your writing.
6. To be successful as a writer you must give up your alter-ego, "Super Me."  

I stuck the note on my bathroom mirror and exhaled. Losing my fear was like tossing a hundred pound weight off my back. And once you do the initial thrust, gravity takes over. I was floating on my new found courage. Until the next night, when I was chosen to lead a mock triage situation for my Emergency Response Team.

I had 30 seconds or less to assess if someone was dead, needed immediate attention, or if they had non-life threatening injuries. Apparently, they’d brought in an Emmy award winning make-up crew. My first victim looked like he’d been tossed off a five story building; gashes three inches deep, right foot twisted backwards, blood oozing from his nostrils. How does someone fake all that? I mean, what did he do, shove a bottle of ketchup up his nose? And that backwards foot?

Anyway, I felt the old familiar fear jellying my insides, so I remembered my FEAR NO MORE list. Just then, the guy in charge jammed a stopwatch in my face. Twenty-two seconds and I still hadn’t made an assessment.

By now, the zombie in front of me was laying on the ground, convulsing. I was freaked out by all the blood and that darn, twisted foot. The head honcho demanded action, so I acted. I pushed out my chest, clenched invisible balls of courage and said, “Yes, I can.” The floodgates opened and I felt fearless. I was so proud of myself, and I think he was too, because he told me to go home early.

I smiled the entire drive home, pleased that I could cross a few things off my list. But I wasn’t done yet.

Don’t allow any webs to get in your way.  It was night by the time I arrived home. As I approached the darkened entryway, I thought of number 3 on my list. I braced myself and bolted through a giant cross orb weaver’s web. Thin, spidery threads stuck to my cheeks over my lips.

No turning back, I was almost through. I blew out a breath and leaned into it. But the spider wasn’t about to let me cross enemy lines without a fight. She plopped on the back of my neck, completed a few push ups at the base of my skull, and scurried overhead. I threw open the front door, dropped, rolled, and gagged.  But I’d made it! Unharmed and unbitten. Valiant, I quickly crossed number 3 from my list, but I still needed to tackle 4 and 5.

In her blog last week about fear, Laura wrote that she fears her time is running out on becoming published (even though she's at the tipping point) while Fae wrote about battling perfection (her near-perfect world building skills are stellar).

I, on the other hand, own both sides of the same coin. Either way, I lose. My critique group is writing while I’m jamming my scribe light under a laundry basket, moonlighting as Super Me. I've been allowing urgent demands and pressing needs to wring me so dry there’s no juice left. No V8 to create. We all have promises to keep and responsibilities outside of our craft. That won’t change, so what can I do differently?

I can drool and read Laird Hamilton’s book, Force of Nature, Mind, Body, Soul, and, of Course Surfing.

Concerning family matters, he says, “I brought my kids into the world—they didn’t ask to be born—but it seems to me to be wrong if I stop being myself because of them. It’d almost be cheating them.” 

Cheating them, huh? Something to ponder: is Laird courageous or selfish, a little of both?

Maybe that’s what’s needed for anyone to be awesome in something.

I’ve a hunch my success as writer won’t happen until Super Me dies off and Especially Ordinary Me takes over. That is, as long as my other alter ego, Not Good Enough, doesn’t crawl out of the gutter to brag about how she can’t write; not because she’s saving the world,  but because she stinks.

You see, Not Good Enough is the other side of this coin called fear, failure. Seems to me, if Especially Ordinary Me wants to write, she’s going to have to perform triage, and tag Super Me and Not Good Enough as dead.

Does anyone else have these sort of characters populating their heads?

The first step to change is to admit you have a problem.

Ok, I have a writing problem based on both types of fear. It’s the little things that empower, like creating a daily writing ritual of preparation to begin, like taking a walk, as Beethoven did.

• George Washington rode his horse before sunrise.
• Laird Hamilton plays the same song over and over a hundred times or so before he surfs a big monster wave. The song plays in his head, slowing things down as he tackles nature.
• The famous dancer and choreographer, Twyla Tharp, still creating and touring in her seventies, wrote Creative Habit, Learn It and Use it For Life.  For her, it’s taking a cab in Manhattan at 5:30 am to hit the gym. Regardless of lousy weather or how tired she feels, once inside the cab, she’s committed.  A short clip of Twyla’s skills; listen and enjoy a United Nations of beautiful bodies! Here.
• Since I’m an outdoorsy type, I’m going to try writing outside.

Maybe a slow burning fear motivates you, like it does Laura. Fae’s perfection does create amazing worlds. She just needs to know when to stop being perfect. As for you, it’s your call, adjust the recommended dosage of fear needed to keep your writing going.

I get a kick out of Merlin Man’s blog. He talks about fear and creativity, even a posting titled Scared Shitless, but I really like his link from the podcast of Steve Jobs speech at Stanford’s 2005 commencement. A toast to your awesomeness. Read it Here. Or watch it Here.

If you still want my two cents worth, I have a coin for you. And if you want to amp up your writing, check out Laird Hamilton surfing Jaws. Go on, ride your own wave of awesomeness.

How are you going to triage fear?

Name the excuses, the roles you play, the distractions you keep. Assess your situation and be truthful. What’s really going on to keep you from writing your opus?