I just started writing a new book—well, two of them, but that’s a story for another time. Yesterday I sat in front of my screen for hours and ended up with fewer than 600 words to show for it. It seemed like every bit of volunteer work, every mundane administrative task I had to do was calling my name. That’s not me. I’m the writer who can blissfully ignore e-mails and let the dishes pile up in the sink. My writing time is sacred.
But as I sat at the keyboard, frustrated beyond measure, I realized this phenomenon wasn’t new for me. When I began my last book, Daughters of the Night Sky, I experienced the same phenomenon. It took hours to eke out a few hundred words and I would end my writing session drained and cranky instead of the satisfying fatigue of having “left it all on the field” …or computer hard drive, I guess. With Night Sky, I actually slumped into a depression for a few weeks. I had attributed it to other stressors in my life, which were certainly part of it, but this time around it’s clear that the only thing dragging me down was starting a new project. I had thought I’d done everything I needed to do to be successful:
For me, this should have been enough. Your mileage may vary, of course, but these are typically the only things I need to stave off writer’s block.
The problem? This wasn’t writer’s block. Not the kind I typically waltz around in the murky middle when I’m not sure if the project is living up to my expectations or I don’t know that my plan for the book is on course. This is full on failure to launch. And the good news, is that I had an epiphany. I have a really bad case of nerves when I start a project I care deeply about. It’s likely why it took me ten years to start writing my debut Promised to the Crown in earnest.
Starting a new book is like the first mile of a marathon or the first hundred feet when you’re climbing Everest. If you think about all the toil that lies ahead, it’s very hard to be excited about the journey ahead. Especially if you’ve written a novel before, you know that there are drafts and drafts in your future. Then edits. Then beta reads. Then more edits. All before your agent and editors get to look at it. But the key to all of this? That’s not the problem for today.
Today all you have to do is get words on the damn page. Shovel sand in the box so you can get to building your castles down the line. I realized that I was letting myself get overwhelmed by the prospect of the task ahead of me. What’s more I was putting sub-conscious pressure on myself to make the first draft of this book as good as the polished draft of my last. If I had a boss come up to me with those unreasonable expectations, I’d get HR to intervene. Since I’m self-employed, I have to do something even harder: learn to live with my own foibles.
But now I’m aware of my fault, and as the saying goes, knowledge is power. I’m taking some proactive steps to help get my WIP—and my head—into fighting shape.
So far, it’s helping to get the words on the page and I’m sure I’ll add more tricks if future projects prove daunting (I take solace that this hasn’t been the case for every book!).
What tips do you have for getting over the “New Book Blues”?
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Aimie K. Runyan is s an author of historical fiction that celebrates history's unsung heroines. Her first two novels, PROMISED TO THE CROWN and DUTY TO THE CROWN (Kensington), explore the lives of the early female settlers in Louis XIVs Quebec. Her forthcoming novel. DAUGHTERS OF THE NIGHT SKY (Lake Union, November '17) follows the Night Witches, the fierce all-female regiment of combat pilots who flew for Russia in the Second World War. She is active as an educator and a speaker for the writing community and beyond. Aimie lives in Colorado with her wonderful husband and (usually) darling children.
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