First Page Critique

January 24, 2020

Laura Drake

I’m currently teaching my First Five Pages class at Lawson Writer’s Academy. I love helping writers strengthen their all-important openings. Joe Zarek is one of my students, and has agreed to allow me to share his ‘before and after’ first page.… Read the post

First Page Critique

October 26, 2018

Laura Drake

31 Comments

Thank you, brave soul, for trusting me with your work. I hope you find this helpful.

I chose this month's submission to help explain a closer POV. This reads like a movie script. It is omniscient POV (mostly), which was great in the 1800's, but today's reader wants an immersive experience...they

… Read the post

First Page Critique

August 24, 2018

Laura Drake

19 Comments

Just a note first. I'm ready for more first page submissions! If you've sent one in and I haven't used yours, there could be three reasons. 1. it's too good - people learn from mistakes! 2. It's not perfect, but there's not enough there to spend a whole blog addressing.

… Read the post

First Page Critique

June 22, 2018

Laura Drake

34 Comments

I chose this month's first page to explain how to get close POV. I think it's due to our visual, reality based, Netflix, 3-D modern world that makes readers want an immersive read. They're used to 'being in' films, which makes it easy to BE the character.… Read the post

First Page Critique

May 25, 2018

Laura Drake

47 Comments

I chose this entry to crit this month because, at its core, it sounds like an interesting story, and it could be a compelling beginning. But it's buried in adjectives, adverbs and asides. I can tell this author slaved over this.… Read the post