Writers in the Storm

Marcy Kennedy

One of the most common writing challenges is avoiding point-of-view errors. It doesn’t seem to matter where we are along the writing path—from newbie to multi-published—point-of-view errors crop up like many-headed hydra. Just when we think we’ve got them all, there’s another head coming around to bite us from behind.

When we start out writing, we’re most likely to head-hop, but as we understand point of view better, head-hopping usually disappears. The point-of-view errors we start to make are sneakier, harder for us to see in our own writing.

These POV errors happen any time we’re in a limited point of view—where we’re supposed to stay inside one viewpoint character at a time—and we write something that our viewpoint character couldn’t know, wouldn’t have experienced, or wouldn’t be thinking about. (My friend Jami Gold, who shared her excellent NaNoWriMo tips here earlier this week, calls them out-of-POV phrases. That’s a great way to describe them.)

So how do we avoid them?

We become the point-of-view character.

That might sound simplistic, but if we actually embrace this, we won’t have point-of-view errors in our book. Let’s look at what it means if we think about our point-of-view character in terms of ourselves.

We know our own thoughts and feelings, but we don’t know anyone else’s.

I can’t know what anyone else is thinking, or even if they’re thinking about anything at all. I can’t know how someone else is feeling. They might be smiling on the outside and in agony on the inside. Or the scowl I interpret as anger toward me might simply be gas pains.

I also can’t know why someone does an action. I can’t know if they turned toward me because they heard me enter the room, because they caught a glimpse from the corner of their eye, or because they were going to turn that direction anyway.

So, if we have a female POV character, and we write something like this…

Bob grabbed the signed baseball, angry she’d moved it from the shelf.

We’ve created a POV error. She can’t know Bob is feeling angry or what the source of his anger is.

Understanding that our point-of-view character is just like us in that their perception is limited to their own thoughts, feelings, and motivations is foundational to avoiding point-of-view errors. We can only write what our point-of-view character knows. If they’re making a guess or interpreting based on the evidence they see, then we need to make it clear through internal dialogue how they’ve reached their conclusion.

We can’t sense things outside of our sight, earshot, or smell range, and we can’t experience things before they happen.

Sounds obvious, right? But sometimes we forget to think about how we perceive the world around us.

I can’t see something that’s happening behind me or that’s happening when my eyes are closed. If I don’t notice something happening, I can’t tell you about it. I can’t normally see my own face.

I don’t know what my future holds, and I can’t experience something before it actually happens (including the tone of voice someone else will use when they speak).

So if our point-of-view character can’t see it, hear it, touch it, taste it, or smell it at that moment, we can’t include it. If we do, it’s a point-of-view error. I’ll give you a quick example for this one. Let’s say our viewpoint character is Andrea.

POV Error: Andrea’s face turned red.

Andrea can’t see her own face. This is from the perspective of someone looking at Andrea, but if we are Andrea, we don’t experience it this way.

What We Experience As Andrea: Heat rushed up her neck and into her cheeks.

If we’re Andrea, we experience it from the inside—what we feel.

We don’t think about things we’re familiar with, and we’re consistent in how we do think about things.

There are parts of my life that I never think about, and I’d bet there are parts of your life that you don’t think about either. You probably don’t think about your eye color much at all, or the way your living room looks (unless you come home to find that your husband and his friends have knocked out a wall), or about the way your boss regularly dresses. You don’t think about how to drive your car. You don’t think about the set-up of your society either—you take that for granted. Yet sometimes all those elements sneak into our writing, creating POV errors.

We can run every part of our novel through this framework. What name do you use when you think about your spouse? I only think about my husband as Chris. I don’t think about him as Christopher. I don’t think about him by his last name. Yet, when we write, within the same scene we might have our point-of-view character think about someone as Michael, the young construction worker, and the man.

The way we interpret, judge, and interact with the world depends on our past and personality and is individual to us.

Every fall, my family attends a rural fair, complete with exhibits, vendors, greasy food, and midway rides. It’s crowded and loud and you’re always running into people you know. I love visiting the animal barns and buying foods I can’t get anywhere else. It’s fun.

To my husband, an Iraqi war veteran with PTSD, it’s a struggle. A crowded situation like my friendly local fair translates to his mind as too many potential threats to mitigate. His past experiences mean that he doesn’t see the fair the same way I do.

That’s an extreme example, but we do it with everything we encounter every day.

I grew up with Great Danes. My current Dane weighs 130 pounds. So I love big dogs. I see a big dog and I want to talk to the owner and pet the dog. But many people see a big dog and it inspires fear.

Does that café you visited for lunch have character or is it grungy and rundown? Is the biker on the street corner someone to be feared, criticized, or used as a source for the best bike shops and tattoo parlors?

One of the biggest mistakes we make as writers in terms of setting is describing it in generic terms. Coloring our descriptions with our point-of-view character’s opinions brings them to life, enhances voice, and gives readers the exciting experience of seeing the world through someone else’s eyes.

It also avoids POV errors. When we think about every event through our point-of-view character’s personal filter, we won’t try to describe something with words or opinions they wouldn’t hold. Or to describe things they never would have noticed in the first place.

Next time you’re not sure whether something you’ve written is a POV error or not, ask yourself what you’d experience if you were the point-of-view character.

Do you have any other tips on avoiding point-of-view errors?

• the strengths and weaknesses of the four different points of view you can choose for your story (first person, second person, limited third person, and omniscient),
• how to select the right point of view for your story,
• how to maintain a consistent point of view throughout your story,
• practical techniques for identifying and fixing head-hopping and other point-of-view errors,
• the criteria to consider when choosing the viewpoint character for each individual scene or chapter,
• and much more!

ABOUT MARCY

Marcy Kennedy is a freelance fiction editor and the author of the bestselling Busy Writer’s Guides series, which includes her newest book Point of View in Fiction: A Busy Writer’s Guide. She loves helping writers find ways to follow their dreams without sacrificing their life. The Busy Writer’s Guide series focuses on giving authors the in-depth, practical information they need while still respecting their time. You can find her blogging about writing and about the place where real life meets science fiction, fantasy, and myth on her website. To subscribe to her free newsletter (and receive some thank-you gifts), go to http://eepurl.com/Bk2Or.

Have you ever started a project that other people thought was impossible? That you thought was impossible? How about something that wasn’t impossible, but would take a long time to finish, like going to college?

As an adult, I understand that my life is the sum of every decision I’ve made, even the small ones. Especially the small ones. It has taken me awhile (translation: years) to understand the cumulative nature of small actions.

As writers, bringing this truth to the forefront of our plotting (if you do that) can add layers of character development and plot richness to our work. An added bonus is the punches of emotional impact that keep your readers connected to your characters. If you want readers to keep turning your pages even when they should be doing other tasks, you have to make them feel for, and with, your characters.

What I’m talking about is the micro-concept of the scene-and-sequel plot strategy. (I’m a pantser, so don’t worry that you must have pages of outlines and plotting boards to do this.) For those of you not familiar with scene-sequel, the basic idea is action in the scene, then reflection in the sequel. This keeps your readers from burning out from nothing but action, action, action. The bonus? The sequel is a built-in space for you to show your character reflecting, adjusting beliefs, and making the next decision-which propels you into the next scene.

Warning: I’m going to use some author vocabulary next. Don’t worry if you don’t know the terms, you can click on the links for short definitions. Or you can ask me for clarification in the comments.

At the beginning of your book, the inciting incident propels your protagonist into action. Maybe your hero has a choice to stop and help a stranded motorist in a single-car accident. That choice is the initial propellant for your story. The inciting incident doesn’t have to include fireworks and a band. Touching back to the impact of a small choice can be a very powerful tool to move a story forward, all the way to the last page.

These small steps are what make a character real, not "cardboard." 

Maybe your inciting incident casts your hero into a situation without choice. In my book, Keeping Athena, the heroine crashes her fighter ship on an asteroid–in enemy space. She doesn’t have a lot of choice in her new situation. It’s pretty obvious she just wants to get home. But the small decisions she makes to get home reveal her character, her fears, her flaws, and her drive. The antagonist's small decisions reveal the same for him, forcing Athena to revisit her opinion of him throughout the book.

Here's Athena's last thought before her "certain" death on page two:

In seconds the atoms of her body would be dispersed to Agra-only-knew what quadrant.

Does it make you think about your last thought? Does it tell you anything about her?

Her next conscious thought, upon waking to a dark presence towering over her:

“I track this is life after death. I need a location beam, that’s all.” Athena did her best to sound indifferent, though her heart revved like an engine ready to blow. 'Which is it, heaven or hell?'"

Later, when she finds out she's alive, on a proto-farm asteroid in enemy territory, her response to her rescuer:

She’d died and ended at a farm on an asteroid? "Well, this is definitely hell."

Athena believes Drake is an ignorant itinerant space farmer. For a couple of chapters. Then we get a glimpse of a decision.

Why should a part-time space farmer intimidate her? If that’s all Drake was.

By seeing the small changes in her thinking, the reader can anticipate what havoc will happen next. That's where twists become fun...but that's a whole new blog.

Here are Drake's thoughts upon discovering her, near death, in her crashed craft:

What little hope he had of finding the pilot alive, disintegrated. With a bit more luck, he would have had an Agran prisoner to question.

He carries her inside the station, thinking she's a mere child because she's so small, then he removes her flight suit and discovers she's female.

The brainless farmers are sending little girls to fight us!

Later, at the suggestion he torture his prisoner for her knowledge:

His fist tightened at the thought of subjecting the girl to physical pain and mental anguish to gain scraps of military intel. Put her back in her ship, though, and he’d have no hesitation about frying her.

And later:

She looked so tiny and innocent curled on his bunk—incapable of the mayhem caused by Agran pilots of the class of ship she had crashed.

Later still, he starts comparing her to women he knows:

No female Crewmember would offer to clean after a meal. Yet, to this woman, the act appeared quite normal.

Drake's starting to fall for her:

How had he missed the radiance that surrounded her?

Small decisions, small changes in thoughts or perceptions make your story accessible, like breadcrumbs for the reader.

Ever want to throw a book across the room? If it was a romance, probably the author didn't share the small changes that led to a one-hundred-eighty degree turn in the hero's initial feelings for the antagonist. It takes us time to solidify our emotions, with a good amount of back-and-forthing, even if it's love at first sight. (I know this. After our first date, my husband told his best friend he was going to marry me. Believe me, it wasn't a rose-strewn path to the altar!)

In education, it's called scaffolding, a ladder to bring the learner to the point she needs to be to understand the new concept. No matter what we call it, showing small decisions, small changes in beliefs and small movements on the emotional scale makes a twenty-thousand, eighty-five thousand, or a hundred thousand word journey engaging, believable, and memorable.

And that's why your next book gets purchased.

Do you have a character who makes a small decision that is life-changing? If you were to write your life story, what decision would tell us the most about you at that time?

ABOUT FAE

Fae Rowen discovered the romance genre after years as a science fiction freak. Writing futuristics and medieval paranormals, she jokes  that she can live anywhere but the present.  As a mathematician, she knows life’s a lot more fun when you get to define your world and its rules.

Punished, oh-no, that’s published as a co-author of a math textbook, she yearns to hear personal stories about finding love from those who read her books, rather than the horrors of calculus lessons gone wrong.  She is grateful for good friends who remind her to do the practical things in life like grocery shop, show up at the airport for a flight and pay bills.

A “hard” scientist who avoided writing classes like the plague, she now shares her brain with characters who demand their stories be told.  Amazing, gifted critique partners keep her on the straight and narrow. Feedback from readers keeps her fingers on the keyboard.

When she’s not hanging out at Writers in the Storm, you can visit Fae at http://faerowen.com  or www.facebook.com/fae.rowen.

 

Jami Gold

Thousands of writers have joined the chaos of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) with the goal to write 50,000 words during the month of November. NaNo can be a great motivator, as we all cheer each other on and watch our word count increase. I’ve completed two books during NaNo and will be finishing a third this year, so it can help our writing.

But NaNo doesn’t always work well. We might:

• struggle to find the time to write,
• not have ideas for what to write, or
• feel like we’re rushing out a rambling mess of a story.

If this describes you, you’re not alone. We’ve probably all been stymied by these problems at some point, so that means help is out there. *smile* We’re just at the beginning of NaNo, so the time to fix these issues is now—before we’re too far behind to reach our goal.

Can’t Find the Time to Write?

That can be a trick question for some of us. Sometimes we think we don’t have the time or brainpower to write, and really the problem is procrastination. There’s a difference between real obstacles to writing (new babies, new jobs, and new stresses) and obstacles that let us make excuses.

In other words, do we have to solve our external conflict (rearranging our obligations to fit in writing time)? Or do we have solve our internal conflict (fixing our lack of motivation—which the group aspect of NaNo can help with)?

Either way, we won’t know what’s holding us back until we analyze our situation. Once we have a better understanding of what’s keeping us busy, we’ll know what to attack. As writers, we often suffer from self-doubt, and that means we often walk a fine line between setting realistic goals and feeling guilty because we can’t do everything we think we should.

These four tips I discovered the first time I did NaNo might help us either way:

• Write Every Day: Even if we only get two minutes while we’re waiting in line at the grocery store, some words are better than no words. Think of the Aesop fable The Tortoise and the Hare. That’s how I’ve won NaNo multiple times—I’m the tortoise. *smile*
• Create Daily Word Count Goals: The nature of the NaNo website, where we report our daily word count, can be hugely motivating. The NaNo website’s “My Month” calendar widget with the colors for whether we hit or missed each day’s word count is awesome. I want green on every day.
• Know What Motivates Us: By keeping track of our daily word count, we have better insight into what works to motivate us. Is our daily word count higher or do we reach it faster when we want to get in our NaNo words before our favorite TV show? Or maybe our word count is better on the days when we reward ourselves with chocolate.
• Learn How Far We Can Push Ourselves: By writing every day, we learn which events throw us off our game, and more importantly, which don’t. We learn whether we really need to turn off our internal editor to get the words in. We learn how many words we can get in on a normal day. We learn how much we can squish into a day if we’re not procrastinating.

Don’t worry about winning or what others are doing. I’ve seen friends jump out of the gate on November 1 like the hare in the fable, and sometimes they burn out before the end. We each need to find what works for us and repeat the mantra: “Some words are better than no words.” *smile*

Suffering from Writer’s Block?

It’s not always as simple as just wanting an answer to making it pop into our head. Brainstorming often happens when we’re not at our computer. When our mind wanders, that’s often when our subconscious can mull ideas and let us know what it’s been doing for us in the background. But that’s not the only way to come up with answers.

Here’s a list of ways we can trigger our muse:

• Brainstorm ideas with family or writing friends
• Drive aimlessly or take a walk
• Take a shower (I keep a waterproof notepad in there to capture ideas)
• Listen to music to get in the mood, inspire ideas, or increase focus
• Focus on the question while falling asleep (I’ve often woken up with the answer in the morning)
• Clean, garden, or do laundry (or other “mindless” tasks)
• Work on other art or “gut feel” projects
• Bounce ideas off our dog, cat, or other pet
• Think of how another story handled that plot issue and twist it (maybe into the opposite approach)
• Change the point-of-view for the scene
• Ask the characters
• Do a virtual “dartboard” and pick a random event to throw into the story and shake things up (one writer swore by inserting a dead body)
• Back up to the last place the story felt “right”
• Go back to our premise or story seed and remember why we wanted to write this story
• Use a beat sheet to see if we’re off track
• Figure out what should happen later in the story and see if that fills in blanks
• Write a different scene
• Start writing things we know aren’t right and see if our muse shows up to take over
• Set a timer for five minutes and write every crazy possibility
• Do a word sprint to force ourselves into the moment
• Act out a scene—what would we do next?

“Wasting” Time with a Messy Story?

The fast pace of NaNo sometimes means that we might put words on a page that we know we’ll have to delete later. Maybe we’re going off on a tangent, or maybe our story just isn’t making sense. Let’s take a look at how to make sure our story doesn’t end up a “hot mess.”

Hot Mess: A story with no overall arc; feels like random bits and pieces thrown together; plot events happen for no rhyme or reason; characters don’t grow; story themes undermine the story’s goals, etc. (i.e. a revision nightmare).

Before we get too deep into that mess of a story, let’s see if we can fix our idea with a bit of planning—at least of the kind of planning that will help us the most.

Need Plot Help?

If we’re better at making up characters as we go along, we might want to plan some of the main story turning points.

• What drags the character into the story and forces them to make a choice to get involved?
• What raises the stakes and tension during the middle of the story?
• What’s going to make the character lose hope before the end?
• What’s going to push the character to change and face the obstacles at the end?

We can plan a lot more, obviously, but that gives us a starting point and an ending point. That Point A and Point B will give us a direction as we write.

Need Character Help?

On the other hand, if we’re better at making up scenes and plot points as we go along, we might want to plan the character arc. That means we have to know the character’s Point A and Point B.

Some people find character arcs harder to “see” because they’re more mental than physical. But in character terms, Point A and Point B means we have to know their destination (what they want) and their beginning (what’s holding them back).

• What does the character long for and desire? (story ending)
• What choices are they making that keep them from their dream? (story beginning)
• What do they learn? (how they change)
• What are they willing to do at the end that they weren’t willing to do before? (story climax)

Hopefully with those tips, we’ll all be able to make progress in our writing this month. Happy writing!

Are you doing NaNo? How have the first couple of days gone for you? If you’ve struggled, do these tips give you any ideas? Is there something else holding you back that wasn’t covered here?

 

After triggering the vampire/werewolf feud with an errant typo, Jami Gold moved to Arizona and decided to become a writer, where she could put her talent for making up stuff to good use. Fortunately, her muse, an arrogant male who delights in making her sound as insane as possible, rewards her with unique and rich story ideas.

Fueled by chocolate, she writes paranormal romance and urban fantasy tales that range from dark to humorous, but one thing remains the same: Normal need not apply. Just ask her family—and zombie cat.

Find Jami at her blog, Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, and Goodreads.

 

 

 

About Ironclad Devotion:

A faerie princess evading her fate…

Earth is no place for a faerie, but Kira can’t go home without dooming her people. Desperate to avoid the pull of her homeland, she fosters an abandoned girl, the child’s joy a source of much-needed energy.

A blacksmith with something to prove…

When Zachary Chase discovers he has a daughter, he’s determined to be part of his child’s life and not repeat his mother’s neglect. But to open the little girl’s heart, he must earn her foster mother’s trust.

One night is never enough…

Despite their rivalry, Kira and Zac’s desires tempt them into one no-consequences night. Yet the more passion flares between them, the more Kira risks destroying the life she’s carved out on Earth—and endangering those she cares about in both worlds.

Amazon | iTunes | B&N | Kobo | Additional Retailers